Prime Relational Real-Estate: Searching for the Place to Call Home

House hunting can be exciting and nerve racking all in the same, but ultimately, when you lay your eyes on the very domain that you’ve been praying for, believing for and searching for there’s a particular feeling/peace that comes with knowing this is exactly where God wants you to reside.

It may not have exactly everything you want–but has enough character, enough warmth, enough accessibility for you to feel comfortable calling it home. You have to ask vital questions to ensure that what you see is align with what you need and what you can afford–or would it ultimately be a liability.

Depending on the type of person you are and what you are looking for, will define the type of house you’re looking for…some are more concerned about the aesthetics of the house, some about the character, some about feel of the house, some about the work required to maintain the house, some concerned about the environment that surrounds it, and some about the affordability. Most individuals are concerned about the cumulative qualities of the house and when it’s right, they are willing to put forth the effort it takes to make a peaceful investment in what they want.

Though I don’t own my own home (YET), I have been involved in several house hunting experiences with friends and relate it to the process in finding an appropriate mate.

No matter how desperately one wants to dwell in something they can call their own, it’s important NEVER TO SETTLE OR IT BECOMES A LIABILITY.

We all are a work in progress, but everyone who purchases a home doesn’t have the patience for “fixer uppers” and wind up in a situation where though access to the relationship was easy and required little investment initially, but the effort required to make it presentable, cozy, warm, comforting is exhausting or on the other hand they don’t want to put forth the effort, so they end up in a relationship that’s a hot-mess and when other’s peer upon it, they can tell.

There are others searching for a relationship that appears to be “all-that” from the outside, but if people took a deeper look on the inside–they would see that the upkeep is taxing, pretentious, stiff, and lifeless.

Have you ever walked in a home where the place was decked out in white and you were afraid to step on the carpet in fear of leaving a mark and the owner getting upset with you?

These relationships are like walking on eggshells and a person never really feels comfortable or at home. These relationships require alot of energy and in the end the owner feels as its too much of a cost because they can’t be themselves!

On a different note, there are these relationships that seem a little “ugly” at first–perhaps it took a little working on the outside and inside–but the owner took time to do so. They didn’t feel that it was effort or an obligation–they took the time to make sure the relationship was the best that it could be. They invest in something that seemed not to hold much value and flipped it to make the value appreciate. These are transitional relationships–relationships in which you see through the “stuff” that other people run from, decide, it’s worth the investment, put forth the effort, and increase the value of that person’s life. Transitions take time, effort, patients, care to detail. Not all have the patience for it, but for those who do, it can go two ways, it can be the most beautiful relationship ever or again you can find you settled and it becomes a liability.

Lastly, there are others that just prefer a relationship that is move-in ready. They don’t want to go through alot of difficulty, don’t want to put up with the transitional changes, the effort of of high-maintenance relationship or dealing with the effort it takes to “fix” someone up. They want to see it, have peace about it, move in and call it home.

Though move-in ready, doesn’t mean you can’t add a little of your own touch to that relationship–but many aspects of it are already in place. Not much work is needed, if any at all. Just because it’s move-in ready, doesn’t mean you won’t hit a wall from time to time, but because of the majority of the aspects of the “home” being in a good place–it takes off a lot of stress in the relationship. This is the type many desire–forgetting that all relationships take some level of work.

Recently, I thought, we have to hold individuals to a higher standard than we have been doing. God has designed a particular layout just for you when it comes to your relationship. You must ask vital questions to help determine if what stands before you is aligned with the blueprint God has set for you. “Does it look like God, sound like God, feel like God, love like God”? If the answers to any of these questions are no, then perhaps it’s not God’s best for you to reside and it’s okay.


The opportunity will come to explore another lay-out, you just have to open to observing different places and keeping everything in perspective. Eventually, you are destined to come across a place that you can so peacefully call home.